Watching Molly yawn is just amazing. She opens her mouth and her tongue sticks out a bit. Then, as she yawns, her mouth opens wider and her tongue just grows, and grows, and grows, 'till finally it's gotta be about 2/3rds the length of her body.
It's like, Christ, Molly, how much tongue have you got in there? Are you part iguana? Can you catch grasshoppers with that thing?
"Hey Molly, is there some way that we could harness all the static electricity your fur produces?"
"Seriously, daddy? Seriously? I'm a philosopher, not a physicist."
"Did you know that once upon a time physicists were known as 'natural philosophers'?"
"Um. I'm also not a historian."
"I never get that right. Is it 'a' historian, or 'an' historian."
"I'm also not an English teacher."
"Do you mean you're not a 'grammarian'?"
"Like I said, not an English teacher."
"Oh well. Anyway, it's a pity about not being able to harness the energy of your fur. Talk about a renewable resource!"
"Oh well. Anyway, it's a pity about not being able to harness the energy of your fur. Talk about a renewable resource!"
"Yup." She yawned. "That's a pity alright."
Yesterday, on the way back from the dog park, Molly told me that she wants to create an internet dating site called, “OKDoggie.”
“Um, I don’t think a dating site for dogs would do very well. Canine internet usage is still very low.”
“How would you know, daddy”, she grinned slyly, “on the internet, no one knows you’re a dog.” She did her little chuckle-snort. “But anyway, it wouldn’t be a site for dogs, it would be for their humans. After all, OKCupid isn’t a dating site for cupids.”
“You want to start a site for dog’s humans?”
“Yes, it would be for humans that live with dogs, and want to meet other humans that live with dogs. I think it is hard for some people to accept another human who puts the needs of their dog first. Humans can be very selfish that way – it’s always ‘me, me, me’, instead of ‘my dog, my dog, my dog’.”
“Hmmmm. Well, what about humans who aren’t fortunate enough to care for a dog? They need love too.”
“Yes. Absolutely. They need love more than anyone! Humans that care for cats, birds, fish, platypus, whatever, would be allowed on the site, as long as they understand the role of the dog in the relationship.”
“Well, that’s a relief.” I enjoy humoring Molly. “So, how does this work?”
“It’ll be easy. You create an account, then post photos of your dog, what you love about your dog, the games you and your dog like to play, and what you are looking for in a stepsibling for your dog. Then you look through other profiles until you find one that you think your dog will like and send them a message. If it’s a match, you get together and sniff each other’s butts. Voila.”
“Voila? I think this idea needs more work.”
“Really?” She looked stunned. “Well, OK, you give me your ideas and I’ll see if I can integrate some of them.”
“Sounds good, Molly. I’ll let you know what I come up with.”
Wow. An internet dating site for dog’s humans? I’ve certainly heard worse ideas that took the world by storm.
“Um, I don’t think a dating site for dogs would do very well. Canine internet usage is still very low.”
“How would you know, daddy”, she grinned slyly, “on the internet, no one knows you’re a dog.” She did her little chuckle-snort. “But anyway, it wouldn’t be a site for dogs, it would be for their humans. After all, OKCupid isn’t a dating site for cupids.”
“You want to start a site for dog’s humans?”
“Yes, it would be for humans that live with dogs, and want to meet other humans that live with dogs. I think it is hard for some people to accept another human who puts the needs of their dog first. Humans can be very selfish that way – it’s always ‘me, me, me’, instead of ‘my dog, my dog, my dog’.”
“Hmmmm. Well, what about humans who aren’t fortunate enough to care for a dog? They need love too.”
“Yes. Absolutely. They need love more than anyone! Humans that care for cats, birds, fish, platypus, whatever, would be allowed on the site, as long as they understand the role of the dog in the relationship.”
“Well, that’s a relief.” I enjoy humoring Molly. “So, how does this work?”
“It’ll be easy. You create an account, then post photos of your dog, what you love about your dog, the games you and your dog like to play, and what you are looking for in a stepsibling for your dog. Then you look through other profiles until you find one that you think your dog will like and send them a message. If it’s a match, you get together and sniff each other’s butts. Voila.”
“Voila? I think this idea needs more work.”
“Really?” She looked stunned. “Well, OK, you give me your ideas and I’ll see if I can integrate some of them.”
“Sounds good, Molly. I’ll let you know what I come up with.”
Wow. An internet dating site for dog’s humans? I’ve certainly heard worse ideas that took the world by storm.
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