Molly Sez

Last night I shooed Molly off the couch so I could lie down and meditate. Ahhhhhh. It was so nice and warm where she had been laying. 

“Thank you, Molly. The couch is so nice and warm!”

“Sure, thank me, woo hoo. I’ll just warm up a spot on the ottoman while you ignore me for the next half hour. No problem.”

Huh? “Well,” I told her, “it is my couch.”

“Yeah? And who was it that invited me to live in their house?”

“Hey, Molly, what’s up? Are we having a fight?”

“I’m sorry, dad. I’ve just been so anxious about the election. Even with it over, I’m still tense.”

“Uhhh, you were concerned about the election?”

“Yeah, it was a real nail biter.”

“The election for President? Biden vs. Trump?” I asked.

“What’s that? I’m talking about Mack vs. Charlie for king of the dog park. Then when Benny came in as a third-party candidate, no one knew if there would even be a clear winner. It was a squeaker, fur shur.”

“'Squeaker', huh? 'Fur shur'? Are those puns?” Now that she is making puns, I had to ask.

“Ha, ha, ha, ha,” she snorted, “I guess they are puns.” She laughed. “It wasn’t intentional. I must be getting good at these puns if I’m doing it by accident!” 

"If no one got a majority, would you have to have a 'run' off?  Nyuk, nyuk, nyuk."

"Oooof", she pantomimed being punched in the gut. "Good one dad."

“Thanks! So... who won?”

“One what?”

“Who won the election, silly?”

“Oh, it was Mack. I think he’ll make a good king.” She opined.

“Well, that’s a relief!”

“Psssh, you’re telling me!”

Anyway, we made up, she stopped being pissed at me about the couch, and I was able to meditate in peace. What a relief.